Earth called Caroline.

"Earth Called Caroline"

Had a nice lunch with a friend back from college.

Our office buildings are like standing besides each other, we didn't know until 2 months ago, however, we people are weaker on making plans after this surprisingly great news. For example, we deal a dinner, it usually happened 3 months after the day we made that very deal. Another brutal yet vivid example, we promised a girl-kissing show, but never happened 4 years after making that promise. Anyways. Had a great thai food with a dearing friend. Nicer conversation, mostly talking about our jobs, future (how 'exciting'), and talking about his upcoming wedding which I am forbidden to attend due to his bride's some weird complex against me.

Maybe. A close female friend that hangs around for almost 14 years, "Definitely" a threat. Like, "she will steal my husband from my wedding." Silly, but as a woman I will totally respect her concernment and give up my every right to attend this wedding. Just in case that I will steal that guy from a poor and pretty bride, who I hold him as a friend for so long time and never come cross my mind that "I should date him anyways".

Silly silly silly.

Anyways. There is a wedding in May that I should be there as almost a family member, I can't.

This afternoon I was checking my drafts. You wouldn't believe that how many pieces I had left unsent. I discovered one for my former boss, the big face boss. He was harsh on me and my attitude, probably because he was under great pressure on pulling revenue, also because, he has every right to be harsh on mediocre staff, i.e. ME.

I never thought that about myself. Mediocre.

In fact I am mediocre, when I am in very bad shape, drifting all the time, doing so so in company, not too crappy to get fired, not too good to be promoted. We call it Mediocre.

In this system we are lacking of motivations all the time. Want to have a dinner with a friend, however it gets very cold and I am tired, cancel dinner. Promised to send a poet to someone, but the poet isn't as delicate, deleted whole page and send apology note. Time to get my ass out of the apartment to hear a friend's agony from life/job/relationship, then my belly hurts like crazy. Call her instead.

Most of time I am drifting.

Like the lunch today. Planned to have dumplings, his favorite restaurant. He suggested to go there by motorbike. Too troublesome, I don't want to wear other people's helmet. I said: Let's check around the neighborhood, maybe we can find some yum food. He proposed Beef Noodles. OK, I like beef noodles even tho I know there won't be any delicious store selling beef noodles in my neighborhood. When we were trying to cross the street, I spotted this Thai restaurant. Told my friend: Let's eat Thai food. He was all surprised and said: I have got only 500bucks...
Bang Bang Bang! One alternation after another.

I can't believe that every of my dearing friends still love me and will hang out with this chaotic system. Or maybe there is already an assassination conspiracy.

Reading my old drafts, one after another, I've heard that Earth's calling.

No matter what kind of theories in those drafts state, it's unrevealed and won't be, necessarily, those tangling twisted minds are far gone, even some of the address are officially meaningless for me. Coming back to reality, I set my foot on the soil, stop wondering "What if" and "Why or when". To those never going to happen plans, to those never going to see again acquaintances, to those never going to effect me fellows, to those never going to be answered questions, and to those never going to echo memories, I said farewell.

Earth's calling.